《沈园二首》 其一, 陆游

海外逸士

城上斜阳画角哀，沈园非复旧池台。 伤心桥下春波绿，曾是惊鸿照影来。

With the sunlight on the town walls, the horn sounds sad;
The pond and pavilions in Shen Garden are not the old ones.
Heartbroken for spring waves under the bridge still green,
Which once reflected her stunning shadow in the water.

云天

逸士先生好译。 欣赏了。 ：）


Heartbroken for spring waves under the bridge still green,
可否写为：
Heartbroken for spring waves still green under the bridge

请先生赐教。 先谢。  ：）

云天

海外逸士

I think "under the bridge" should directly follow "waves",  because  it denotes that the waves are not anywhere, but under the bridge,  then describe how the waves look -- green.

what do you think?

云天

伤心桥下春波绿
Heartbroken for spring waves under the bridge still green,

Prof. Yishi, thanks for your kind explanation.

Since "bridge" precedes "still green", I was just wondering, will some foreigners think "still green" modifies "the bridge" ?  :)

Have a wonderful week ahead!  :)

海外逸士

當有兩個修飾成份修飾同一詞語時﹐只能有先後﹐讀者必定會根據上下文去理解的。

云天

回复 6# 海外逸士


It makes sense.   :)

Thanks, Prof. Yishi!